My Swan Song begins...

I drew a countdown on my Office Door.

Well, look at that. I’ve nearly made it to the Death Ride!

It only took five-plus months of near-daily training. Every Saturday, most Sundays were given over. Early mornings and late nights alike. Cold, rain, heat, cramps, illness all joined the ride at different times. 

There were times this season where I doubted I was going to make it this far. All of the Death Riders are a little crazy to even try to get through the training program. Some of those training routes are a step beyond just brutal, they’re sadistic. I’ve had my bike broken, my Achilles damaged. I’ve felt sick as a dog. I’ve had no energy. I’ve cried going up hills. I’ve seen spots. I’ve been so dehydrated I could barely think straight.

Some part of my brain is still in shock. I don't do things like this, ever. Yet here I am. 

My heartfelt thanks to all of you who’ve supported me in this mad endeavor: whether close at hand or far away, with donations or words, everything you’ve said and done has made me accountable to you. That accountability has driven me this far, and it will drive me to the Finish Line on Saturday.

Thanks to you, I’ve discovered depths within myself I’ve never before plumbed. I’ve recalibrated the lengths to which I can push myself: physically, mentally, and emotionally. I’m more in touch with all the myriad signals of my body than ever before. I’ve never been as physically fit, I cannot be more ready than I am.

Now…now it all comes down to this. The waiting. Counting hours…as I’m writing this there are about 50-odd of them left before I’m on the Start Line. Tapering is hard. The energy in me is building and I can’t get on a bike and spend it. I’m supposed to sit and conserve for the big day.

So I won’t give any long missives tonight. I can barely sit still. I’ve got too many things to do. Packing lists to check and cross-check. Bicycling supplies to put in order. Documents to print. Nervous energy to spend. I may have to take pills to fall asleep tonight, tomorrow night. So be it.

My mind keeps racing through strategies, mulling it all over. Then I remind myself: this isn’t a race, the only goal is to survive. That simplifies everything.

My love goes out to you all. See you on the other side!